Friday 21 December 2012

When nothing pacifies and the cries turn to screams


There is nothing more distressing to a new Mum than to hear the constant cries of her child in distress especially after feeding, changing, burping and pacifying has failed to change the child’s state of expression that something is wrong.

A baby cries differently just as we adjust our tone of voice and posture to get our message across.  The cry of feed me or change me has less postulation than if they are really distressed.  If this was for a feed or to be changed it all resolves quite quickly.  Infants may stop to see if thode sounds of sweet melody have been heard.  They may get themselves stressed because nothing has happened and their crying increases with some help from the limbs they continue to try and get your attention.  These gestures are not over animated but can be affective in showing their displeasure at having to wait. 

Your senses all play a part of the quest to search the cries and determine what the cause might be.  Smell, touch and sight are what follows’ the earache you may now have.  Not to mention the headache or feeling as distressed as they are because you haven’t soothed away their discomfort.  Frantic now and sending the baby your stress at their stressing you stresses them.  The fact remains that even a new mum has maternal and instinctive feelings that propel them into action and eliminate one by one possible causes even if they have to telephone their Mother or indeed the Mother in Law for advice.

You have done all the right things and followed all the advice you’d been given or read about but the baby keeps crying.  So now you need another surge of maternalpompandceremony.  Don’t worry you have it covered.  In the blue print you see.  You are now holding the baby again and soothingly trying to pacify it by talking calmly and softly maybe even singing to them before holding them up to your shoulder and there is an almighty volcanic eruption of wind from both ends and the baby stops crying slowly sobbing until it feels secure and safe again after the excruciating pain it could not fathom or resolve by crying and wriggling about in the cot.  Baby now sleeps a little exhausted and past time for next feed, but all is well.

What if the baby doesn’t break wind and continues in the distressed state, pulling its legs up and bringing in the Mexican wave to drum it home that something is seriously up and  ‘I don’t just want attention or a cuddle or to feel the security of my mother’s arms.’  What then…?


A new born infant attunes to sounds over their first few weeks hones and it homes in on mum’s voice in some cases dads too.  It also starts to communicate with coos and goo’s and grunts and groans.  And even being soothed and feeling safe by mum’s constant chatter.  Stirring or jumping at sudden noises such as banging doors and screaming offspring or loud bursts of sound.  They can adjust to sounds quickly and soon settle into that longed for routine. Before they cry they may spend some time with searching eyes for quite some time before crying for that needed attention to feed and change them.
The uttering little coos and goo’s might not have brought mum to them because she is preparing feed or content baby is happy and investigating but not seeing mums face will eventually register with the little one and the crying will begin.  Hungry and needing changed the vocalisation begins.  It can be a mix of soft bouts of crying and waiting to see if mum shows and repeating until she does and the longer it might be may determine the intensity of increase from those hearty little lungs.

Distressed Children

There is a few seconds lull as baby thinks you’ve got the message. That you have recovered them and sound sympathetic and soothing.  Sometimes at this point you may also experience the above after picking the child up.  If that is the case then all is well and baby will go off to sleep again.  If first child this can be quite common for a few weeks to a few months.  There is nothing like your first child nor that knowing and efficiently acting on experience and knowledge with your subsequent offspring.  If there was another way of helping your child to get rid of Colic giving you more peace than earache?  Why would it not be divulged to all new mums?  All too often now Calpol and other baby sleep products are given for a quiet life and the constant sedated state is not a good one for the inquisitive infant on an adventure of a life time.


Two very important words should be introduced at all anti natal classes and for mums to be, mums delivered and birth to seven years at least.  These two words are BOWEN and Cranial Sacral.  Don’t quibble about 3.  You know what I mean.  This was brought home to me recently when treating the parents of a 15 week bundle of joy.  The dad mentioned it first and then later in the afternoon the mum was in for her treatment and we had a chat.  I suggested she try Bowen and if the baby was awake I’d do it then as her husband was calling back to pick her up.  With the lightest of touch I did the upper stoppers and end of respiratory.  I saw the family off and with that “Didn’t seem to do much so what’s that going to achieve?” look upon their faces.  The following week they were both back in for treatments and I had suggested Bowen for them too.  The baby was reported not to have suffered with any more colic and had been sleeping better as well.

Her mum did inform me though that the evening of the Bowen for baby resulted in a lot of burping from both ends and a rather messy present when changing her.  And she was puzzled as to the effectiveness of such gentle moves.  Always and ever ready to demonstrate Bowen in action I had already executed the moves of demonstration shoulder procedure on the dad and now I took the opportunity to help a more than ten year problem with the mums left inner scapulae and shoulder due to working at that time in a call centre.  I also used the time to demonstrate the difference in pressure used for her and that on the Baby.  She admitted to being puzzled at the gentle over in a flash moves made on the baby and the results it had.  The couple had been struggling for two weeks with trying to pacify the baby and followed all the so called ways tried and tested. 

“Do you have a leaflet on the Bowen?” she asked and I provided one suggesting she looked on the website too as there would be more information on how it has been used effectively for Babies to the elderly safely and remarkably with little publicity from those now qualified Doctors who know that exploring other ways of healing are important to those practitioners devoted to aiding better health and wellbeing.  Baby Bowen was a worthwhile course I was privileged to do following my qualifying as practitioner.  They are truly wonderful perfect creatures are our infants and what a great start with their lives when harmonised in perfect balance and realignment if after a difficult birth or in any distress after birth.

I must point out here that there may very well be other distress signs in how your baby or child cries, or vomits.  Pyloric stenosis is a fairly uncommon condition affecting the opening (pylorus) between the stomach and small intestine in infants. It may run in family line skipping a generation and affects mainly sons, although daughters can suffer with it too.  The pylorus is a muscular valve that holds food in the stomach until it is ready for the next stage in the digestive process.  In pyloric stenosis, the pylorus muscles thicken, blocking food from entering the baby's small intestine. Pyloric stenosis can lead to forceful vomiting, dehydration and weight loss. Babies with this condition may seem to always be hungry.  In my case I was the only one of eight children to have experienced this but two of my grandsons and one of my grand-daughters also suffered from the same symptoms and needed an operation to correct it.

 Pyloric stenosis

There is also another problem that should be ruled out with young children and that is a hernia.  The inguinal Hernia is more common in infants and accounts for 80% of the indirect type associated with such complaints.  The Direct type is more common with the elderly and rare in children.  A young child can be in a great deal of discomfort and pain, being told there is nothing wrong with your child or that you are a neurotic mother is no way to handle such symptoms of distress when all avenues and examinations have been carried out.

had the unfortunate experience but rather fortunate as it turned out to know a lady who was having problems with her young son.  She had been going to her Doctors and the hospital for two years.  They continually told her they could find nothing wrong. The boy was about six months when I first knew them but I didn’t see her as often as my wife did being friends with her.  There were a few occasions where this distraught mother was about to devour something stronger than calpol herself but also still dozing her child as per instructions because they had found nothing wrong.  The child was examined many times but no diagnosis was given.  We were expecting our first child and were asked to babysit.  Our friend found it difficult to get out and to have regular baby sitters because of the constant crying.  Mind you there had been clues when getting changed but as my wife changed his nappy the real McCoy here not the throw away brigade.  I noticed a swelling on his right lower abdomen and it was large.  I cringed in a pain of sympathy and started telling my wife that our friend would have to take him to the hospital and get them to deal with this.  I believe the swelling can come and go and can ease after repositioning baby once fed and changed.  But this would have been hard to miss if seen by GP or Hospital Doctor.

I calmly suggested to or friend to take him and demand they deal with this now for it had been going on for so long.  Our now tearful friend was in remorse for not knowing but how could she the Doctors didn’t even know.  She admitted the swelling had come and gone at times and she had explained but the swelling was not prominent when seen and quite a few times it was brushed off as baby asleep and best not to disturb him too much.  Here is probably a good reason not to use calpol.  If baby sedated and relaxed possibly no discomfort will be felt but when getting changed or depending on how he was held when feeding or comforting him the pains and discomfort returned and so did his screams.  And boy was his lungs in good shape.

She calmed down and composed herself and I suggested she did not let them tell her to give more calpol or that there was no cause for concern. She did and he grew up after a small operation without the discomfort and pain he’d experienced for nearly three years.  This was in 1970/71 I would suspect it would not happen now because there is a lot of information that can often rule out worry and concern but beware for it may add to them too.  Always go to your GP Don’t be afraid about their labelling you as neurotic – and if you don’t get treatment or referral for diagnoses. Change your GP or go to the hospital direct.  You have the right to complain to the medical council too.  No Doctor should be labelling Mothers or Fathers as neurotic.  They are just concerned parents and if first child even more so because the experience is new and the learning process is masterly in action with the best possible teacher: the young infant.

You will know your child and have a bond that unites a form of communication and understanding maternally or paternally for dads can be included.  If your child is screaming and wriggling in pain evaluate and make your decision.  Make good use of your midwife and district nurse at the surgery.  Ask your GP and if you suspect anything ask if it might be that or what he thinks it might be.  Get a diagnosis as soon as possible.  You will know the difference between your Childs cry for food, comfort and changing or interaction and when they are suffering for the screams are more intense and nothing sooths or comfort them.
My mother diagnosed for our Doctor my pyloric stenosis after he continued to say he was at a loss over weeks of my vomiting and weight loss.  He returned to the surgery had a read up on it and called my mum to say an ambulance was on way for her and myself to go to hospital right away. She had been a nurse before getting married.  Doctors may not come across every ailment but they should always give the parents more than a label of being neurotic.

This was all so many years before my discovery of Bowen and the knowing about the constant stream of wellbeing existence.  That’s another story and back then the influences of my mother’s nursing career influenced my thoughts on being a Doctor but over medicating, suicide and my grandfather’s death changed the search for a different way to ease and change pain and suffering.  However, it wasn’t until forty years later that I found Bowen.  So the moral of the story is:  Don’t be a chocoholic but enjoy the chocolate.  Don’t be a workaholic but enjoy what you do and don’t suffer with Colic…!  In all cases Bowen it…!

Bowen will work with the individual blue print that is uniquely you.  No matter what!  You will benefit as your body permits.  Improvements will be realised but expectations may just as over enthusiastic therapists express their faith in Bowen, doubt and fear or lack of understanding of this little gem can fuel the ‘How is that gentle snail pace move going to shift the problem I have in my shoulder, or hip or back…?’  Simples… Bowen is the Gentle Giant of Therapies and while some people prefer massage, reflexology or acupuncture this little giant will take you there and allow you to then decide how you want to maintain your good health and improved posture.  You can have occasional top ups or go back to modality of preference.  No matter what you choose to use as maintenance your Bowen will have instigated changes that you may not realise right away and not connect with a few months down the road when you have changed your job, moved house made that big decision you were putting off until sure of commitment.  You can even have help to conceive, possibly saving a fortune for some and after giving birth or to help baby after a stressful birth or illness early on and if nothing else for the first seven years of their precious little lives.

Mums - Dads – Babies - Toddlers – Even the terrible two three and fours can all benefit – Preteens – Teenagers with repetitive elder terrible twos and threes having tantrums, strops or lacking enthusiasm for life in either work rest or play – Studying for exams – getting back into work – finding a job and lacking confidence and incentives, feeling lethargic and disempowered – Even grandparents can benefit - In fact there are scores of other reasons but maybe you should ask how it will help you?  There may be other modalities that you could be recommended to use along with your sessions.  Like palates is often complementary to your Bowen work.  You may need some counselling or another form of therapy that can be recommended to help with aspects that never need to be discussed with your Bowen practitioner.  If by any other name would it have spread or been accepted more?  No named after Tom Bowen and trusting the process is all you need.  You make the moves and the rest leaves with their shoes.

                                                         
For more information contact Gary direct at: essentialtherapy2@gmail.com
Or visit the website at http://essentialtherapycentre.org